I'm working on a lesson for my kids for Sunday, and I was originally going to skip from Abraham to David, but I saw a craft for Joseph, and there was a check in my spirit not to skip over him. But I think it might be more for me and what I need to learn from him then what the kids need to learn from him. A friend had posted a blog about Abba... Daddy. God is our daddy! He is there for us when we fall, and when we hurt, He's still right there. He allows us our decisions and He allows things to happen to us that we don't understand, that we feel aren't fair, and that HURT US!!! Some of you know what my life has looked like the last few months, and I'm hurting! I ache emotionally daily. Some of this is due to things that have been done to me, but a lot of this pain is coming from decisions that I have made. These decisions have cut me off from those around me that would have loved me and helped me work through my pain. Instead I chose for many years to hold all that should have been worked out inside me. I have reached a point that God is helping me release some of this pain, but it's painful. And there has been a significant amount of anger that has worked its way to the surface. Now I am no Joseph! I question, I doubt, I have fear, and I wonder WHY??? I had a screaming match with God (which I lost) and I got into a fight with a pillow (which I won) and just in general am confused and angry. I wonder though how many times Joseph questioned. Scripture doesn't tell us his every thought, word, fear, and question. I think there had to be some of each of those, but what God found important was something completely different than any of these things. God found Joseph's actions to be important! What do we know about Joseph? He was obedient, he stepped out when God told him to, and even when it was hard and it must've seemed like God had forgotten about him, he did all as unto God! I think Joseph did question and wonder, but he knew that his GOD had given him a dream and a purpose and he held fast to that regardless of the circumstances.
I have heard numerous times from numerous people that it's okay to feel angry with God, and it's okay to ask him why! I finally after many many years believe that!!! What's not okay, is disobedience because of that anger! God doesn't call us to perfection, because He knows that outside of Himself that's not possible! He calls us to obedience, to love, and to glorify Him. If these things are accomplished it doesn't matter to Him if we scream at Him, it doesn't matter if we doubt, it doesn't even matter if we feel like He's forgotten us!!!!! God is our Abba, and He is perfect, and He can handle our fears, and doubts! He lifts us above them, and if we express them He helps us work them out and He loves us and holds us through them! I got for the first time probably in my life a human example of God's arms wrapped around me! After my pillow fight, a lady I know just held me and let me get out all the tears that I could manage. (which were a lot might I add!) This was her showing me God's reaction to my outburst!! And I would encourage each of you, my friends, to reach out to God with your anger, fears, hurts, doubts, and questions. He wants to hold you through them, and who knows that He won't send you a human embodiment of His love! **abrazos**
